listening to judy garlandbelt out her soul in song
and thinking of my mother
like everyone thinks of his mother
and then thinking that no
everyone does not love his mother
and remembering the times
i had not loved mine
listening to judy garland
and seeing my mother
sick in the hospital
full of tubes and sorrow
the sun desperate in its attempts
to lighten this room full of lunacy
and feeling angry at her for her sickness
wanting her to make herself better
remembering evenings on the couch
with my nose against the glass
watching the lengthening shadow of my father
my mind imagining the miles
as they stretched out in front of his car
my heart in the seat beside him
when my mother would tell me
that it was time for bed
all the hockeybasketballsoccer games
that she never saw
the lacrosse championship
that she never even knew about
only knowing the colour of my uniform
at the hospital where they left me
and her anger at my injury
seemingly our joint displeasure
at each other's illnesses
was the bond that meant the most
my childhood catalogued
by the alternating bouts
of sickness and healing
that checkered the years
and now listening to judy garland
singing through her torment
i imagine my mother dancing
twirling on the happy arms
of the man of her dreams
endless nights of smiles and more
hers for the taking
Copyright© michael dennis/Pulp Press Book Publishers